i never realised at the time

how much he didn’t tell me
but there was a lot
but the other one tells me things when they’re happening
not exactly before but still
and he’s going to be here
not really sure how soon but it will happen
i don’t know how i feel about this
i don’t know how he feels anymore
i don’t feel
and thats kinda the problem
but I’ve felt carsick all day
george is having another attempt at functioning
only a few more days till i see holly
but i still haven’t done any work on my art
i don’t care about it anymore
i don’t think i started caring about it in the first place
i want to make things that i like and not things that mean something
i could burn all of it and not give a shit
i don’t want to go back to school but i don’t know what i do want to do that is actually something i can do with my life
i need a hug


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