turned out jess couldn’t come today which was sad but lily ended up buying her birthday present so there was an upside i guess
mike and i had a good talk today about how i was pretty sure the oxytocin connection had been broken and that i was feeling a lot better about all that stuff
i don’t think I’m going to go back and see him unless anything else happens
which I’m kinda hoping it won’t
but not outright saying i would avoid it if it did
its like 80%
i told holly about it and she was proud of me
met up with lily at the cafe and ended up going to get the piercing straight away
it was just a whole weird experience
like i didn’t really think about the whole piercing process until i was sitting there and the lady was taking all the things out of the sealed bags and shit
but in the end i love it even if its slightly crooked i don’t care that its not perfect it means something
after we walked around and then got food and sat on the balcony and talked and talked and talked about stuff that we probably shouldn’t have been saying with other people around but i really didn’t care
after a while we walked around a bit and then went back to the corner next to the trash and sat down on the floor and judged people for an hour making up things about their lives and it was pretty fucking great
a guy looked at us at one point and i said something along the lines of “he’s wondering why theres a piece of trash just sitting on the floor next to the bit and making the place look untidy” i made a few me being trash jokes but that was one of the better ones
i need to figure out what I’m doing for jess for her birthday
painting the earrings i think
when i was at the bus stop there was a really loud and intimidating homeless dude who was trying to talk to me but i managed to ignore him
i can’t close my door when i go to bed tonight and i might just end up sleeping on the couch because i just can’t deal with my door being open even slightly when I’m trying to sleep
fucking painters
i really want to say thank you to brodie for everything that ever happened and everything he’s done because i wouldn’t be me and i wouldn’t want to change any of it and i like our past
kinda trying to figure out if id still lose it with him given the opportunity… i guess it depends on the circumstances and how it comes about
he did say if we hadn’t fucked by the end of the holidays he’d be surprised
why am i thinking about that anyway?
theres kinda a lot of things i shouldn’t be thinking but who cares and who’s gonna stop me


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