theres been a whole lot of nothing going on
but at the same time theres been so much emotional shit I’ve been going through

yesterday literally nothing happened which is why i didn’t even post anything proper
then later that night late enough that it counted as today i found the maximum ride movie and told him about it an we actually had a proper conversation
not really but better than it had been
movie was a let down though
fang’s dramatic entrances and old ari were the only good parts in it
fang’s actor was shit… wasn’t emo enough
thats pretty much it
i mean i know theres some shit i want to say but i can’t really do that because it would only end badly if i didn’t say it in person
i mean it would end badly either way
but regardless of other emotions and like all the other shit theres still a thing that i want to get over and done with and theres a point where it could be possible and i know it won’t actually happen because i mean seriously??
still though
anyway i got my passport photo done today and mum said something like are you sure you don’t want to try do something with your hair you might look back on it and hate it
and i replied with I’m going to hate it anyway it has my face in it
she laughed and didn’t really get that i was serious
im not eating properly anymore
haven’t for a long time
the only thing i used to know that i would have was breakfast but i don’t even want that anymore
and no its not cos Ive gone off my food cos I’m sick like mum said before i just don’t want anything that i can think of
everything is just going wrong
i hate it
i hate a lot of things and yeah including myself in that
I’ve run out of youtube shit that i want to watch too and thats not good like it took a while longer to catch up with the sidemen stuff than with others cos they just have so many videos and channels and shit but yeah I’ve caught up and its not nice
I’ve been reading today
its the kinda story i would wanna live in but id never be good enough to be part of it
this whole thing it pointless
im in a bad place


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