Bucket Boy

so yeah i have the noah problem at the moment
he kept saying he wants to read my poems about brodie and i don’t know why
i also think i have four poems memorised
which is kinda scary considering I’m can only have three poems for the slam
i want to write something good for noah
brodie and amelia aren’t officially back together but they’re together and i worry about it
noah doesn’t get why I’m so protective of him like yeah i know he doesn’t need that but when someone has messaged you telling you they’ve just tried to kill themselves and you realise that the bravest strongest person you know gave up it shatters your entire perspective on the world and its not ok
four years of all this shit and no i can’t explain it in a way that anyone else can understand but it is how it is and yeah
he won’t be there tomorrow
i have the lifeline appreciation thing tomorrow
and maybe the major production matinee and i had guitar today
i got a new song and i like the song but playing it is really fucking hard
f#m and picking and its so annoying and it hurts my hand
i like wearing my blue jeans now which is weird because they’re blue
I’m losing the emo
noah wanted me to answer the same questions about him as i did about brodie do i like him and do i like like him
i avoided answering because i don’t know what to say


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