We Didn’t Fuck Up So Bad

i really want to go on a rant about everything that happened today and how i was on the verge of tears for a large part of the day and evening and how i am pretty much constantly feeling left out and ignored but honestly i can’t be bothered i don’t want to go over it
just the basics being gross people its not cute anymore for me it never was and other people are starting to get weirded out by it and also jess doesn’t seem to have a problem with it which i find weird considering she bitched about yashbir kissing me like once when we were sitting next to her
the realisation that the three of them were staying for music night
the soul destroying pizza expedition involving tears and abandonment
the remaining time before thing where i went to new world with immy and sean because they are a way better couple than the others
and then from three(?) rows in front of them becca and i could hear them kissing like seriously what the fuck
yeah i found an orange pen and drew on becca’s hand and then on jess and then lily and the his hand
we were in the second half near the end of it and there were technical difficulties and yeah it was scary as fuck my entire body was shaking and i spent the rest of the thing leaning on jess almost in tears which only becca knew
there was a song that these girls did and one of that they kept repeating went somethin like blonde hair blue eyes perfect smile with a girl who’s perfect for you but you’re perfect for me
which was the one that had becca and me pretty much crying
not pretty much i was actually
so yeah i feel shit about everything and i said to becca if i wrote a song would she sing it with me and she said yeah so i started writing one and guess what its about
i need to stop
i also need to stop eating my guitar pick
i hate autocorrect
i hate a lot of things
but this morning i told noah that i didn’t hate him


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