I’m Scared

this had nothing to do with my one post a day thing or to make up for the last one being short and everything to do with the fact that i think something is wrong with me
like actually wrong not like ha ha I’m emo so theres something wrong with me or i overthink things all the time whats wrong with me its more like i just had a thing where i couldn’t move for fear of falling over couldn’t pick anything up because my arm was shaking felt like i was hearing everything underwater had a fizzing fuzzy noise in my ears everything went kinda red/pink and blurry and i got a weird taste in my mouth
i feel like saying this doesn’t happen often but i also feel like saying it does… it used to happen when i was in year 8 and 9 but only a little… like id feel a bit fuzzy and then get a weird taste in my mouth… id forgotten till now that that had happened… but i do remember one time that id gotten up from watching tv on probably a saturday morning to find something to eat and i went to the pantry and then i was lying in front of the fridge about a metre behind where id been standing before and i don’t remember anything from between those two points… rebecca to begin with had just thought i was messing around but id hit my head on the tile floor when i fainted so then she got worried… in the end i was ok and i think we just said that i hadn’t had enough to eat or drink and id stood up too fast…
I’m pretty sure it has nothing to do with lack of fluids because I’ve been drinking more water than usual lately
its happened a few times since then and i don’t know what specifically causes it but today specifically its been happening more often like more than one a day usually when i get up to go to the kitchen it usually hits me when i get to the couch about 5m walk from where I’ve been sitting on my bed and usually i just say I’ve stood up too fast or something like that and it lasts for only a handful of seconds and then I’m ok again but this time was different
it didnt happen when i got the usual distance away from where id been sitting i’d gone to the bathroom to clean my piercings cos they’ve gotten a bit iffy… so whatever id been doing to the right one happened and it fell out so i was like ok good way to clean it and i did that one and then figured id take the other one out to clean it the same… so id just put it back in when i started feeling sick like i was going to throw up and i thought something like well i usually don’t have this weak of a stomach when it comes to these kinda things… but then it wasn’t about that… and i went to the kitchen to get some water because i figured it would be over in a few seconds so walking wouldn’t be a problem but then it wasn’t over… i got to the kitchen and was going to get a glass but then i started shaking real bad and i was scared id break something so i just stood there grabbing onto the bench and trying not to fall over…
and this was when the colours and the hearing things happened and yeah it kept happening for a couple of minutes and i was really really scared
nothing of that scale had ever happened before and i don’t know what was happening if it was some kind of seizure or something and i don’t know if its going to happen again or when or where


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